The thought of having a baby has always been something on my mind. I am a woman for goodness sake. It's my divine nature to want to be a mother and give life. But other thoughts have pushed their way forward... "We're not financially ready." "We need to be more established and successful." "I'm scared." "Having a baby will change our lives forever." "We're enjoying out time together, just the two of us." All of those thoughts are legit I suppose. I mean, it's normal to factor in all types of concerns when one is considering making a life altering decision. Right?
Right.
Nevertheless, I'm hungry. So ridiculously baby hungry I don't know what to do with myself.
Every magazine I see in the grocery store, pictures another celebrity's 'baby bump'. Every fast Sunday (it seems) there's another baby blessing... sometimes multiple ones. Every Facebook status is announcing the exciting news of the 'new arrival' of their first, their third. It's all around me. Pounding into my brain. I feel like the world is screaming, "DO IT!" And it seems like that's all I can think about... wanting to be pregnant. Wanting to have a baby.
Jace and I have a list. A long one. Consisting of 'oh so darling' names that we wish for our future children. I find myself really, really wanting to put that list to good use. And as of late, I've come to the realization that we will never be 'financially ready' and that yes, 'having a baby will change everything' and that it's completely normal to be scared out of my mind.
But when? When do we make that life altering decision? That is the question that remains unanswered.
10 comments:
We were the same way, having the same thoughts but we realized that's why the church says not to think those things because you will always be thinking, oh let's wait for more money, better time in my career, more settled...we just realized we seriously would never start a family unless we just started 'trying' and then nature took it's course! Good luck, it's a huge decision! But you'll be an adorable mom!
You are so cute, I think every single normal person thinks exactly what you guys are, and then one day you feel that little nudge and you know that it's not up to you. That someone else much stronger, powerful and all knowing is in charge and that He has faith in you and your hubby. Then ready or not, mainly not you step in and you do it, and it's the most amazing thing in the world because you get this little angel from heaven who has been entrusted in your care and you have someone pretty powerful backing up your decision! That doesn't solve the money problems, or the being settled, or being done with school, but it does feel good. And it's hard and sometimes you want to give up, or go back to being just the two of you but when that kid smiles at you, or hugs you, or tells you they love you, you know that there is no way you would trade a million dollars, a big house, an established career or more time with your hubby for that sweet baby (no matter how old they get they are always your baby.)
Not that I have anything to say on the subject!! :)
Just know you aren't the only one who feels that way.
Do it... call me :)
I love that you guys have a list of names! :) Well, whenever you guys decide to jump into the parenting world... Just know that you both will be GREAT!!! It's never going to be easy having and raising kids but it'll be fun and so worth it! I can't speak from first-hand experience but I've helped raise kids for the past 16 years, so I kind of know. :) Good luck and I can't wait for a little one to come into the Helean Clan! :)
i remember coming home from church and crying because i wanted a baby and it seemed like everyone but me had one. then we had a 'surprise' pregnancy and we were so freaked out, but it all worked out. sometimes i don't know how, but it does. i don't think that you can always be "ready" in every way that you think, but i also think that you need to be prepared and have a game plan. rely on god to let you know when it's right for your family and then it just works out. you'll be great!
Funny, those were also the same fears I had about getting married: I was so young, we weren't financially stable, it would change my social activities, I was scared out of my mind, etc., etc. Turned out to be a pretty darn good thing I looked past all that!
Come to find out, having a baby (or two...or three...or four...) has been much the same way. Fortunately, when your time comes, you'll find that the positives far outweigh the negatives. (And you'll be blessed with the support of family and loved ones to help get you through the negatives anyway!)
You took the words right out of my mouth. My husband and I feel the same way. I just did a blog post on this a few weeks ago (however, your title was much less morbid - pretty sure mine was, "I eat babies...") ANYway, we have many of the same concerns. I also really want to be a journalist which would be really hard with a baby...but I think I want that more. Ugh. It's tough. And my husband will be going to dental school and doesn't want to have one until we see what dental school is like first. Blech. I'm not sure I like this "waiting" thing.
I swear I only have one more comment! I've been thinking about you guys lately and hoping things go just the way you want them to. Anyway, I was just thinking one thing you never know is how long it will actually take you to get pregnant... just one more thought to add in the mix.
maybe it's not just you wanting one, maybe it's you feeling that regardless of circumstances you're ready for one. Either way it will work out. It's one of the first things we covenant about and the Lord will bless you regardless of finances etc. I think if you decide to wait, it will be the right choice for you, if you decide to do it then it will also be the right choice. HF blesses us for following him, sometimes we get too caught up in "when is the right time". just trust yourselves and tell hf that if it's now, you're gonna need some help to make things work out
just a thought...after our conversation the other day, and then reading this post...do you think maybe Heavenly Father is pointing you in the baby direction now? It's hard to know which thoughts are just our own, and which ones are from the Spirit. But every good thing comes from God. I agree he wants us to be prepared, but I also believe he will prepare a way to make up the difference. No pressure...just a thought. (And it would be so awesome to have a baby around the same time! :) )
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